离别

11 December 2011

还有十七天，我又要离乡背井了。上次的离别，对我造成了很大很大的阴影，我害怕了，真的害怕了。对未来，即憧憬，也恐惧。好希望有人能在寂寞时，能陪陪我，安慰我。。。但，这一切，都不可能实现。我，只好硬着头皮，去学习独立。独立面对，及承受困难。

Secret garden

11 December 2011

Watched a korean drama named Secret garden lately. Aigoo, how I wished I’m the Actress in that drama…!

Wondering if I’ll also have such romantic love story in the future…? Haha…

SORRY

11 December 2011

I finished my Diploma, finally! During these years, I really glad that I have met them. Without them, I’d probably will not have such happy and fun time during my college year.

Something happens that make us apart. I don’t really want it to be like this, I don’t want this kind of ending between us. I love you guys. I can’t get her forgiveness, I can do nothing. Reminiscing those great memories with you guys, making my heart more sorrow. Looking at the picture of us, I can’t continue watching it, because only heart ache I felt. 

Autodesk Autocad 2011 Associate and Professional Certificate

11 December 2011

Thanks to Politeknik, I get a chance to learn some advanced skills in Autocad. It’s one of the finishing school programme organized by the Politeknik, sponsored by government. I was lucky enough to choose this course. Together with me, my best buddy Farina and Ajumma a.k.a onet. The program started right after we finished our final exam. It’s a continuous 15 days intensive training, so we can’t even have our holiday during weekend.

But the output is awesome! I got this so called “ PROFESSIONAL” cert from Autodesk!

Thanks to everyone for the teaching! Well done…

Asshole with a fake lamb skin!

13 November 2011

Today, I encounter an asshole! Why, because that asshole only know how to critic and comment on other.

There’s a Chinese proverb 披着羊皮的狼 mean a wolf with a fake lamb skin. Why I’d say so, because this person is so damn asshole, whenever there’s activities, they’d only show up face a certain time, criticizing on how people do their job. If you’re so terror aka mighty, then why aren’t you do the thing yourself asshole!

You, asshole never showed up your asshole face, I hate you asshole! I hate you so much until I wanted to curse you so badly! You asshole, watch out before criticizing other, or people won’t help you in anything anymore asshole!

Damnit!

Car accident

13 November 2011

Few days ago I had a car accident where I’m being hit by a car in front of Likas Mosque roundabout. It happens when I’m on my way back to home. Then suddenly a stupid driver who doesn’t know the rules hit me. Damn! She didn’t apologize instead, claiming that she’s not wrong blablabla. So the next day I went to the police station wanting to make a report. After waited for few hours for the girl with her mom(and another wearing police uniform bodyguard) came. But rule is sill a rule, I won and they have to admit that the girl is wrong and compensate me.

I really thank God that I have no serious injury after all (at first I thought my finger broken, but nay….). Moral of the story, no matter how careful you are there’s always asshole on the road!

Bruises on my leg….

Heart disease

8 November 2011

Recently I think I starting to have the symptom of heart palpitation. Sometime it last for seconds to minutes.

I’m not aware to this until I heard someone said that most heart disease patient do not know they have heart problem as the pain aren’t in the heart area but other. He said that the patient started to sweat and nervous before the attack.

I think it hit me when I heard what he said. So, is it normal to have palpitation while I’m in the relaxing condition? It’s like I can hear my own heartbeat.. Hopefully nothing bad happen because my dreams haven’t been realize yet.

Final year, final semester, final exam…

8 November 2011

Time passed by so fast. Next week will be my final exam.

It’s been three years, six semesters. Throughout these years, I’ve learned a lot from my friend, about love, friendship, companionship, relationship and etc. It suddenly saddens me when I found out all of these will be over after out final exam. I will no longer see them in the future, most probably.

This parting makes me reminisced my primary graduation, the feeling is almost the same. I knew time pass by won’t come back, I knew it! I’ve grown up to be an adult, where I no longer entitle to receive any 儿童节恩物. No more childhood fun time.

I’ll do my best for this exam, for the very last time.

Bon voyage my friends!

Working holiday at New Zealand

4 November 2011

Recently I read a blog regarding to this working holiday scheme between Malaysia and New Zealand in the blog.

http://jackinnz.blogspot.com

I’ve always wanted to travel there, wondering how it’d look like being in other country. Probably it’ll be one of my aim in future.

There is a famous proverb in Malay saying that “Hujan Emas di Negeri Orang, Hujan Batu di Negeri Sendiri, Lebih Baik di Negeri Sendiri”.

Well, I’ll have to give it a try, New Zealand, wait for me!

Life, how I’ve wasted it for the pass 21 years.

27 OCTOBER 2011

I have been thinking a lot recently and how I react unusually active in this month. I keep on posting those positive words, but it doesn’t even change me to a better person. I keep on saying that I wanted to success; I wanted to be rich so badly. But the question is, have I put enough effort in it? Have I put my 101% in what I wanted to achieve? The answer is, I HAVEN’T. I don’t even give a shit, nor care about my future. I have to admit that I’m having almost a mental breakdown, how I should deal and attain balance between school, friends, Red Crescent, and my family.

I’ve lose a valuable friendship, where it teaches me a costly lesson, where I am reminded that I’m an asshole these years. I was told that I’m being too selfish toward them, (actually I’m being scolded). I’ll never forget a word that thrown to me that day, it is so true that I’ll make it as my lesson of life ( so that I don’t treat people like shit). I regret it, but it changed nothing. What done is done, I’ll have to MOVE ON.

I keep telling myself that I should stop Face booking, but I failed. So, it is time to change, by starting from tearing out the addiction. Because I wanted so bad to change, I wanted to change myself.

Changes are hard, I knew it. But I’ll change for the sake of a better future.

Life shouldn’t be wasted like that.

最近看到了朋友个个都上大学去了，唯独我还在这儿混。我好不甘心，真的好不甘心。但是问问自己，自己又努力过追求梦想吗？自己又真真实实的努力过吗？我惭愧了。。。

是时候改变了！

Mt Kinabalu Climbing! 爬神山记！

21 October 2011

on 16-17 October 2011, I made it to the low peak of Mt Kinabalu!

There is total of 6 person including me. We went to Kundasang a day in advance to prepare ourselves before the climb. Arrived at rose cabin about 1530 hours, we then head to Ranau for dinner, followed by Karaoke-ing at Perkasa Hotel. It’s weird when there’s a guy approach us when I’m playing dart. I’ll never forget how he’s saliva poured to my face…

Then, we have a good rest, prepared our bag and woke up early in the morning! Our guide is Patrick!(forgot to take pic with him)

So,I decided not to use porter’s help! I’ll carry my own burden!! Haha… Basically it’s all about stairs….rocks…stairs….rocks….and etc…(via timpohon gate) There’s not much time to look around as i wanted to get to laban rata ASAP. Depart at 0910, arrived 1420. I’m so touched until i cried…Haha…

Carson waterfall…

I’m having breathing difficulty for the first and second KM…But its fine afterward…

Beautiful scenery, nice buddy!

See, told ya its all about stairs, it’s impossible to lost, unless you don’t follow instruction.

There is a part of the route where you’ll see trees look like bonzai…

It’s my greatest achievement ever! there’ll be no more obstacle in future that will stop me!

I just realize I am an asshole all these time!

21 October 2011

最近一直在忙着final project的事情，也就因为这，我才知道，我原来那么的自私，那么让人讨厌。。。就在presentation那天，朋友生气我了，气到她从学校跑了回家。

去了她家，求着她回来学校，她打开了门，骂了我一顿。原来他们忍了我两年了，原来我一路来对他们太残酷了。对于她的责骂，我已无话可说。想了一想，他们愤怒，也是正确的呀。我一路来都以为自己很厉害，把别人当下人看，现在我尝到了。心里好难过，不好受。

这份友情，也许就到此为止了。我没什么奢求，只希望他们能原谅我的无知。我很高兴能认识你们，真的，也就因为有了你们，让我在这三年的学习生涯中充满乐趣，让我体会到真正作为学生的快乐。

也许我也该是时候回到一个人的生活吧。一个人上学（现在的我，上学也觉得没意思了），一个人吃饭，一个人看电影，一个人的寂寞，也只能一个人体会。

谢谢你，4themost！对不起。。。

Seorang-seorang….

28 September 2011

Jalan seorang-seorang, duduk seorang-seorang, naik bas seorang-seorang, balik seorang-seorang… My lecturer touched on this recently( i think she’s talking about a senior that might have a little autism)

Well, I have to admit that beside 4 the most, I’m almost seorang-seorang all the time(because of them, my life shine a little brighter). Sometime I felt alone, really wish to look for some for companion. Is there anyone willing to listen and share my thought?

Anyone out there???

Eye Operation

28 September 2011

Today daddy had his eye operation done. It is heart breaking to see the wound.

I was asked to drop the eye drop into his eye. I’m scared, to see the wound. Ieven dream about it during my nap. I think I make no chance to be a doctor, as I think I’ll faint seeing those wound. Moreover want me to stich it, no way…. Better stick to my engineering….!

忠：实

28 September 2011

为何人，不能忠？

今天的我，又看到人，原来是那么的脆弱，那么的抵挡不住诱惑。

我看到了他，一次又一次的在我面前背叛她。为何他，是一个花心萝卜？

我实在看不下去了。。。即使你有多孝顺，多勤劳，多帅，最终你会被你那‘没良心’背叛。

我，以后不会找像你那样的伴侣！

花心萝卜，大骗子！

People who inspired me!

27 September 2011

“When you don't get a miracle, become one”-Nick Vujicic

He is Limbless, yet He is now travelling around the world… My idol!

There is one day I complaint something to my brother, Steven. He told me 别计较酱多，学到的是自己的！I’ll remember this, keep it deep inside my heart!

One day, I’m going to study abroad, one day…

别计较酱多，学到的是自己的！

Bro… @ My Sisters

27 September 2011

There’s separation, disconnection and parting occurs. I can’t really describe the  feeling but somehow, I’ll reconnect the friendship between us, as soon as possible!

Busy Busy Busy!!!

27 September 2011

I’m too busy lately…

Busy with my final year project (having no clue to do it), I’m stress! California bearing ratio is making me nuts, driving me crazy.

Busy with my dad’s eye operation. He’s having a cataract operation tomorrow, may God bless him for the smooth and success operation! 

Having tremendous  headache thinking only my project. I hope to finish it as soon as possible or else I’ll never have a restful night! I dream of nightmare, often recently…

Dare to fail!

27 September 2011

I started to read books recently, it is amazing! Well, I’m not a bookworm, I don’t even like to read. But somehow, someone inspired me to read, he is my Master Shifu (it all started when he showed me his final year thesis and said to me that he actually read a lot of books and understand it). It amazed me on how he able to finish the entire thesis by his own word. It is by reading, he said.

Reading, is the source of inspiration, it is the only way to get more knowledge. For the first time in my life, I actually read the entire book( imagine how thick it is). It is a good ( i mean GREAT) book of inspiration, giving me the new definition of failure. There’s always quote saying that we must go through failure before we can really be success. It is so true, and the examples of people who failed and standing up again, making me “whoa”! It teaches me how to fail, and standing up again.

I often felt like a failure, and I often failed in making a good decision. But somehow, I believe everything happens for a reason, and probably God have something greater for me.~~Amen

“When a true samurai goes into battle, he is prepared for death but more often than not it is the opponent who meets death.”

Blood Donation….We love, care and give!

24 September 2011

I have been waiting for this donation for so long( I mean since the day they announce on the news, I quickly mark down the date into my calendar so that I won’t forget the exact date for the donation). I came as early as 10 am, but it seem like a lot more is earlier than me….

Here is how it looks like when I’m arrive…. Crowded with people…!

Came here with my buddy, Farina (leave for her dinner), Fit3, and Pikachu!

Let’s talked about the process of blood testing. I tested twice actually, first I was rejected because of low haemoglobin in my blood. I’m so frustrated as I wanted so much for the goodies bag(seems like selling my blood rather than donating it,haha!). Then I go and have a set of McValue lunch, and returned for the second attempt! I made it for the blood test this time, but not for my blood pressure, again, I was told to walk (run and jump around) for a while. Damn, WTH my blood pressure was only 100/60, so damn low! After a while i went back for the second pressure test, I made it with 120/80! Haha…

I’m A type, what about yours?

Cheering during transfusion

The banner of the campaign. Probably will be my last blood donation at Sabah.

Received goodies bag. But I suppose to get a McD voucher and a tuna bread, due to out of stock, I’m given 2 pocket tissues to replace the bread… Ouhh, my McD! Haha!

Another collection of certificate…. Ngeh3…

Cameraman, a pitiful job!

19 September 2011

Once again, I’m being a fool today. Being a camera man for them, realizing that I’m not part of them (it’s not the first time I’m being abandoned and I just have to act nothing happened but a happy feet, I’ve used to it), it feels suck!

Actually, I don’t mind being a cameraman, there’s nothing wrong holding the camera and capturing other. But there’s a problem here, I don’t get any credit for showing up at your show, instead being neglect by you and your gang. So, this is what I got for travelling all the way from my house to KK, this is what I got?!

What the heck, there’s no more way I’m gonna do that again, not even if you beg me. Seriously, who the hell will gonna do that for you? You are too obvious in favouritism! Nope, I’m done here. I’ll just have to be patient until 17 October. Oh God, give me the strength and patient to go through these hard time, give me the faith and wise that I needed before my anger explode furthermore. Amen…

“Not being valued or appreciate, better quit up early before getting anymore lame ass scolding and mumbling”

Nice quote huh?!

Malaysia Day vs. 兀兰之路

16 September 2011

人才外流,究竟为何? 这就要问,大马为何酱偏心。

今天，也是马来西亚日，国家也不知独立了几年。但为何新加坡却比大马更加繁荣呢? 大马，其实很多人才，但为何外流呢？因为留在大马，得到的，永远是不公平的待遇，贪污的公务员，就连我自己，也对大马失去了信心。

马乃下，对我实在不公平，没给与我同等的机会。今天的我，并不光荣。腐败的政府，贪污的官员，要我怎么光荣的了？

瞧着吧，总有一天，不用靠‘你’，我也会出人头地的！

~未来的憧憬~

16 September 2011

一张文凭，一顶毕业帽。。。

 

最近大学录取名单出炉了，身边不少的朋友也陆陆续续抵达大学报到了。也有同学去到英国的Scotland深造。不知为何，这一切，让我觉得自己好失败，好失败。。。我，是否后悔了当初的选择？心里清楚自己要干什么吗？我，很矛盾，真的很矛盾。未来，会是怎样？我，又会在哪儿？

最近想了再想，自己究竟寻找着什么？POLI毕业后，会到哪里？工作，人工会是多少？心中有着不少的疑问。

终于，我找到了。我需要的是目标。有了目标，将会有追求的意志。我的目标，就是要大学毕业，硕士毕业，甚至是博士毕业。我要追求学问，知识。我，要成为一个知识渊博的教授，一位有名的工程师，一个有钱人。我，要出国留学，见识外国的一切。

要，想，并不能实现我的梦想。要实现梦想，现在我需要做的，就是把握机会，争取知识，把梦，变成事实。FACEBOOK的活动，也应该停止。手里，也应该有个好书。白日梦，免了。

POLI毕业了，我会工作两年，在这两年里，我要把债务还清，定期的存款，好让我有一日，能够实现出国深造的梦想。在这两年里，我要累计经验，学着独立，面对挑战及困难。

两年，瞧着吧！